You are not my friend. In fact, I have nothing for you. You make me miserable by making me feel bad about myself. You affect my emotions, my skin, my weight and my BRAIN! That is the worst part. When you come around, all my thoughts become irrational. And somehow EACH and EVERY month you manage to sneak up on me and it takes me 3 or 4 days to realize why everything has gone haywire.
But you have not defeated me! Today I got an App for that. Oh yes I did. From now on, I will have a countdown for when you're coming. And I'll be ready! I'll be on alert and believe me when I say - YOU HAVE LOST YOUR HOLD ON ME!
(OK, that's a lot of big talk. I might be setting the bar a bit high...)